We all have our day jobs. Our private lives. Our friends and family. Someone to come home to. But what of those who don’t? What if you don’t have a job either because you try and try and don’t get anywhere or you are incapacitated for whichever reason and the job market is closed to you? What if your past makes it a challenge to be hired at the corner shop down the road? What if you have little formal education and gaps in your CV which you will have to explain to a potential employer with a raised eyebrow? “Don’t call us, we’ll call you”, as the old saying goes.
And what if your private life is the source of all your troubles? Mistakes made in the past, a sour flavour on your tongue which refuses to go away. What if being left to your own devices never was a good idea in the first place? What if that is when your demons come out to haunt you, torment you, cause you pain? Chase you to a safe place, the only one you found, which wasn’t actually safe. For safety is an illusion. Do you understand?
Let’s talk about friends and family. For yours was not a happy home to begin with, not the ones that other people advertise or that you see on TV shows. Not the classic middle class home with a clean kitchen, shining bathroom and full fridge. “Broken homes” other people call them. That’s how others would define your family. Looking back now, you tend to agree. As for friends, many of them are a sad story as well. The best ones didn’t make it, the others were lost along the way, as you first fell under, then paid the price, pulled yourself out and started all over. They are not here now.
Most people have a significant other, someone to support them, keep them company, care for them and share their lives with. Your romantic life resembles a minefield. Human remains spread out everywhere, most of them your own. Everyone claims their love life is tumultuous, but what do they know? For the most part, they can’t begin to understand how wrong things went for you.
And here we are now. Today. You have broken with your past. Put dangerous habits aside and kept unhelpful parties at bay. You are strong. You made it where others did not. You stand alone. Unlike most of us, you realise that we all do when it comes down to it. You went to hell and back. Your heart bares the scars of past injuries yet your warmth is unbeatable. Your eyes speak so your mouth does not have to.
So why do I do what I do and what is that in fact? I volunteer. I take people rock climbing and horse riding. There is nowhere else I would rather be. By your side, life has meaning. It is not just about me. The word community means something. I am part of a whole, where no one stands entirely alone, myself included. By embracing the longing inside me to make a difference in my own way, I am one step down the right path. There are many to follow and the journey is just beginning.